Slim Jim Mild
Fun Fact: Soulja Boy plans to up Slim with his own military ration snack line
Reccomended T.O.E.: During the X Games
“Even by Shady’s standards, Menthol Sausage is a pretty unusual flavor.”
It’s amazing how simple it is to bring the game to a totally new level. We’ve all heard of rappers having their own clothing lines, cologne, energy drinks, and music albums, but get this: Eminem has come out with his own cigarettes, Slim Jim Milds. In Dre’s words: “I really just felt there should be a clove or some shit that captures the experience of what it’s like to be Slim Shady.”
Em, you fail gloriously. Eminem’s persona as Slim has always been unhinged and spontaneous, evil and contradictory, wacky and spontaneous. Of these qualities, the Jim lives up to two - (rotate 180 degrees for answer).
“His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy / There’s vomit on his sweater already.”
To start things off the motherfucker took me 6 minutes to open. I picked at it with my nails (using all phalanges available). I gnawed with my teeth. It wasn’t until I froze it and snapped it over my knee that the packaging relented. Once it thawed, it took me another 4 minutes just to slide it out of the plastic. For a Mild, it’s unusual that this is completely unfiltered. I guess a simile for Em’s signature flow? Also weird since there is also a Slim Jim Unfiltered.
Slim Jim Milds are kinda eminiscent of the Djarum Blacks with its flavored outside, except even by Shady’s standards Menthol Sausage is a pretty unusual flavor. Either way I’m trying to light this thing and nothing is happening.
“I been chewed up and spit out and booed off stage.”
Yeah, this shit is disgusting. I’ve managed to smoke about a third of it and I’ve got headaches in my head, stomach and phalanges. Em, just stick to what you know.
- Kevin Khilds
July 6th, 2008 at 3:41 pm
Time to quite smoking Kev.
July 9th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
I didn’t even know that these were named after Slim Shady…