Snack You Silly

Fun fact: SanrioDigital are hard at work on a massively multiplayer online roleplaying game, Hello Kitty Online
Recommended T.O.E.: The second time you take ecstasy in Japan

“Chalky and unpleasant.”

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Fun fact: Biscoff’s are disgusting
Recommended T.O.E.: When you need an in-flight tongue depressor

“The packaging decals were an aesthetician’s worst nightmare.”

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Kat Skylab, my younger sister, took the time out of her busy day to provide us with this video review of everyone’s favorite nut-fruit: Cashews. Enjoy!

-Jill Skylab

Fun fact: Candy necklaces are cheaper per candy than candy bracelets
Recommended T.O.E.: When hipsters inevitably start wearing them

“There are better options for both your candy-eating and your accesorizing needs.”

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Fun fact: Despite tasting the same, the chocolate in M&M’s Premiums is made from a different recipe than original M&M’s’
Recommended T.O.E.: When you’re out of Grey Poupon

“I was too disgusted to hold one in my hand long enough to test, but I’m sure it would have melted.”

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Fun fact: Stacy, Minnesota, had a population of 1,278 people at the 2000 census, 722 fewer than the year the statistic was taken in
Recommended T.O.E.: During Listerine’s tax-free weekend

“A bourgeoisie snack, but hey, who’s counting?”

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Fun Fact: Coffee ingestion on average is about a third of that of tap water in North America and Europe
Recommended T.O.E.: Before 5pm, please

“The bathroom breaks they induce are a welcome break from the cubical.”

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Fun Fact: Jon Lovitz was the original voice of the red M&M
Recommended T.O.E.: The 1980’s, apparently

“As a critic, I’ve never felt more irrelevant.”

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Fun Fact: Ice Coffee is greater than or equal to Coffee Ice
Recommended T.O.E.: When you’re at Dunkin’ Donuts

“Best part of Double D’s ice coffee - aiming your straw at the ring of sugar at the bottom of the cup and sucking the grains through the cracks of my teeth (you read those pronouns correctly).”

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Fun Fact: When originally introduced in 1978, Whatchamacallits had no caramel
Recommended T.O.E.: When your jaw is wired shut

“I call it a goddamn Whatchamacallit!”

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